Has there ever been a situation in your life where you longed for something greater (material or immaterial), but as if by magic, thoughts like: ‘I just can't do it’, ‘I don't have the time/money/capacity to...’, ‘That's too much for me...’ ‘I don't deserve...’ etc. If so, congratulations - you've met and made friends with your limiting beliefs.
These small but powerful internal voices are like invisible chains that, with a touch of almost poetic irony, prevent us from exploiting all the potential we carry. These beliefs are ‘installed’ in our minds for free, courtesy of society, culture and personal experiences (our own and those of others). But before we start kicking these outdated ideas to the curb, let's understand what they really are because, as Alvo Dumbledore once said: ‘...Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only by accepting can we recover...’
What are limiting beliefs?
Beliefs are those convictions we have about the world, formed from childhood and moulded by family, culture and, of course, society. They guide us, providing a set of answers that are ready, but not always correct. A set of beliefs is called a paradigm.
To make it easier to understand, let me give you a simple example: Imagine your mind as a vast garden, full of possibilities. Now, imagine that instead of growing flowers and leafy trees (strong beliefs), you're content to water and tend only to weeds. Yes, weeds represent limiting beliefs, and as the name implies, they are conceptions that place limits on what we believe is possible and/or deserved.
It's important to emphasise that they don't come from beyond - they are built on distorted interpretations of past experiences, cultural teachings and even fear of the unknown. These internalised ideas act as barriers to our personal growth because they don't show you the truth, but they make a point of convincing you that they are fair and true.
Let's say that our biggest problem with them is that, most of the time, we don't realise that they are there, present, governing our choices.
Where do they come from? The roots of limiting beliefs
Right, but why do we persist in acting on beliefs that we don't know where they come from? Simple: we're beings of lazy habits. Or is it because we believe in our own narrative so much that we prefer stagnation to daring to challenge what limits us?
By the way, it's worth mentioning that various schools of thought have already ventured into analysing this phenomenon (what a novelty).
Cynical philosophers would argue that the true purpose of life is to remain comfortable, not to achieve true freedom. Aristotle said that ‘we are what we repeatedly do’ and that limiting beliefs violate the balance between fear and daring. Plato warned us in his famous Allegory of the Cave, where shadows are mistaken for reality.
Carl Jung, for his part, explained that the collective unconscious is a powerful force that moulds our psyche from inherited ideas. Modern cognitive psychology suggests that our mind creates ‘shortcuts’ to avoid emotional pain, resulting in convictions that are not always true, which in other words means that beliefs are the fruit of past experiences, reinforced by negative thought patterns.
An example of this would be: a child who witnessed their parents' financial problems and constantly heard the phrases “money is hard to earn” or “you have to work hard to earn money”, grows up believing that they will never be prosperous, or that they will have to work absurd hours to do so. The result? They often don't even try to venture into new opportunities, because they already ‘know’ that they will fail. Pure self-sabotage packaged with satin ribbon and a very large label saying ‘truth’. Albert Ellis, one of the pioneers in cognitive restructuring, would say that these dysfunctional ideas can - and should - be identified and challenged.
The philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, always very subtle, would give us a metaphorical slap in the face by saying that ‘man is something that must be overcome’, suggesting that we are prisoners of our limitations because we want to be.
The existentialists saw these beliefs as an obstacle to freedom and the responsibility of being who we really are. Sartre proclaimed ‘existence precedes essence’, suggesting that we are free to define our own path, limiting beliefs manifest themselves precisely as that inner voice that insists on maintaining the status quo, even when it is, to say the least, boring.
The contemporary wisdom of authors such as Tony Robbins and Brené Brown, for example, reminds us that personal transformation begins precisely when we decide to challenge mental barriers.
And neuroscience, for its part, says that limiting beliefs can literally be engraved in our brains, yes, isn't that great! This happens in the following way: by repeating certain thought patterns, we establish synaptic connections (connections that neurons make with each other, basically speaking). Therefore, the more we repeat a belief, the more these connections are strengthened, and so we end up accepting that this is the only ‘reality’.
Religious people would say it's God's will, atheists would say it's a genetic predisposition, philosophers would argue that it's our arbitrary interpretation of what we call ‘truth’ but, regardless of all that, whatever the justification or line of thought - including the Freudian analysis of internal conflicts and the behavioural approach that sees human behaviour as the product of conditioning - everything converges on the idea that limiting beliefs are obstacles to be overcome, in other words, at the end of this tunnel there is a way out, it is entirely possible to change them.
How can limiting beliefs be hindering your growth?
Well, if you've read the block above, you've probably already understood or at least have an idea of how this might be affecting you, but let's make it even clearer.
Imagine that your mind is like a crossfit championship, where the aim is to test your strength, endurance and determination in order to conquer new records. Now, imagine that instead of using modern, functional equipment, you're using rusty equipment with a high risk of accidents (seriously, if you've ever seen how a crossfit championship works, you'll realise that the quality of the equipment is essential) - that's right, this broken equipment represents exactly what you're thinking, limiting beliefs.
Every ‘I can't’ is a ballast that prevents you from raising the bar of your potential (wow, I've outdone myself with that phrase). It's like trying to compete in a marathon with chains tied to your feet. In practice, these beliefs only lead us into a cycle of self-sabotage, which repeats itself over and over again through patterns.
B. F. Skinner, with his passion for behavioural analysis, would probably say that we are reinforcing negative behaviours, even if unconsciously, through a cycle of repetition that keeps us stuck in a state of inertia. Let me simplify this guy's speech with an example: have you ever had the funny feeling of repeating experiences in relationships? As if every time the same ‘story repeats itself’ but with different people? It's as if everything is ‘programmed’ to prevent you from succeeding in that area of life? Does that sound familiar? Yeah, you get the idea, right?
We know that if we let this mentality perpetuate itself, we'll end up believing that mediocrity is our comfort zone. What could be more ironic than settling for ‘ok’ when you can aspire to ‘extraordinary’? It's as if, instead of updating the system, we decided to live forever with the ‘Windows 98’ of our own existence.
Now for the practical part!
How to replace beliefs: An invitation to liberation
The good news is that, just as software can be updated, our minds can also be ‘reprogrammed’ (this word should not be interpreted literally, it's just a figure of speech, because we're not robots).
The first step is to RECOGNISE that that critical inner voice IS NOT AN ABSOLUTE TRUTH, because absolute truths don't exist! That voice is just a remnant of old patterns, ready to be questioned.
Here are some of the practical strategies I've used to deconstruct some of my barriers:
Identify them and Challenge them: Name them! Pay attention to your thoughts, when self-limiting ones arise, question them. Write them down in a notebook or on your mobile phone if you like. Use the question: ‘Is this really what I think about this?’ or ‘Where did this idea come from?’ or ‘Who the F%D#P said that this is true?’ This will take practice! Yes, thinking with your head takes work, but it's extremely rewarding. So PERSIST, it's your life and your growth at stake! (Thinking and having thoughts are completely different things, most people have thoughts and think they're thinking. An elementary mistake).
Cognitive restructuring: Rewrite, replace, transform ‘I can't’ into ‘Why not try?’, for example. Most people don't pay the slightest attention to the quality of their internal narratives, let alone know that they can change them. A simple change can open doors to new possibilities.
Meditation and Self-Knowledge: Take a few minutes out of your day to reflect on your thoughts. It seems like a contradictory exercise, but it's extremely beneficial. You can start with just 5 minutes. Meditation helps us observe these patterns without judgement, allowing you to consciously modify them.
Acid Humour, Irony and Action: Sometimes laughing at yourself is the best way to take the force out of your beliefs. Yes, Oscar Wilde used to say: ‘Life is too important to be taken seriously’, so face your limitations with a pinch of sarcasm too and see how they lose some of their weight. Very important: action is essential, get off your arse and use every little action consistently to reinforce your new beliefs.
Simone de Beauvoir reminds us that ‘we change ourselves every day’, and this transformation largely depends on how we choose to interpret our experiences. Instead of being paralysed by the fear of failure (or success), how about embracing uncertainty with the curiosity of a scientist and the humour of a poet?
Final considerations
To summarise, limiting beliefs are mental barriers formed from experiences, fears and cultural and social conditioning that prevent us from reaching our true potential. Whether from the perspective of cognitive psychology, existentialist philosophy or modern self-help approaches, all lines of thought agree: breaking down limitations is essential for authentic personal growth.
I believe that recognising and challenging our beliefs is the first, and perhaps most important, step towards a fuller life. Abandoning the comfortable cocoon of doubt and embracing uncertainty with humour and courage is the path to becoming the best version of ourselves. As the brilliant philosopher Hannah Arendt would say, ‘thinking without a certain degree of restlessness is simply complacency’, and there is nothing more liberating (in my opinion) than transforming our restlessness into coherent actions and creativity.
Did you like this content? Then leave a comment and don't stop here! Keep exploring the other articles to discover more insights into personal growth, self-knowledge and development. Your interaction is fundamental - leave your comments, suggestions for topics, questions and share this post with your friends who also need to break through their internal barriers. I also invite you to visit the UN4RT website, a veritable ‘backstage’ full of exclusive content that can transform your perspective.
Come and be part of this revolution in thinking and discover a universe of creativity and self-knowledge!
‘Illusion crumbles when we question reality’ - UN4RT
Now, if you have an obscure desire to delve deeper into this, the sources, references and inspirations follow below. Good luck, you'll need it...
Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, a wise and powerful wizard from the Harry Potter series written by British author J.K. Rowling.
The Cynics, those Ancient Greek philosophers who were adept at cynicism, were known for their lack of material attachment and their rejection of society's customs and values.
Aristotle, Nicomachean Ethics.
Plato, The Republic.
Carl Gustav Jung, Man and his Symbols.
Albert Ellis, Founder of Rational-Emotive Behaviour Therapy (RBEBT), known for his approach to cognitive restructuring.
Friedrich Nietzsche, Thus said Zaratrusta.
Jean-Paul Sartre, Being and Nothingness.
Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex.
Tony Robbins, Power Without Limits and Awaken Your Inner Giant.
Brené Brown, The Courage to Be Imperfect and The Art of Imperfection.
Norman Doidge, The Brain that Transforms: The Neuroscience of Personal Transformation.
Crossfit, strength and conditioning programme combining a variety of high-intensity exercises.
B. F. Skinner, Science and Human Behaviour.
Windows 98, The operating system that succeeded Windows 95 was the first version of the desktop platform to be designed and developed for end consumers. Created by Microsoft.
Oscar Wilde, Lady Windermere's Fan.
Hannah Arendt, The Human Condition.
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